(November 2015) Feeling like myself again, for the first time.

You've heard the phrase, "9 months to put it on, 9 months to take it off," right? It's about how women who are pregnant presumably put on weight during that time, and that those women should be gentle with themselves after childbirth and maybe let it take some time for the body to, er, get back to normal. Or as normal as it can be again.

When you've just had a baby the idea that it could take the entire time you were pregnant (which at this time also seems like an eternity) to lose that baby weight sounds awful. AWFUL AWFUL. And depressing. And kind of bubble-bursting. I remember thinking to myself in March, "No way. I'm gonna run and eat well and work out with weights and do yoga and be fit for summer come June." 

Sometime in April I decided that was stupid and I was tired and hungry and exhausted and starving and just generally really too busy to care about what my body was doing. 

So I stopped paying attention. At all. I did need to buy some non-maternity pants that were a couple of sizes larger than all of my pre-preggo pants. Oh well. Who cared? Not me. Shortly after I bought them they got a little snug. Again, I decided to just roll with it and not worry. Didn't buy bigger pants but didn't end up needing to. 

Then earlier this month I realized that those pants didn't stay up very well anymore. What the what now?Hot diggity, time to break out the bathroom scale just for fun. Low and behold I had actually/finally dropped to being only about 10 pounds away from where I was pre-baby-belly. That's a solid 40 pounds lost since January 8.  

O turned 10 months on November 8. (But you probably did that math already.)

9 months to put it on, 10+ months to take it off...

I've gotta say, I'm pretty happy. The other day I crept downstairs and pawed through my pre-baby bins of jeans. After the shock of realizing I owned easily over 30 pairs of jeans wore off (and I did a little sorting - time to go to Goodwill!), I found ONE PAIR of jeans I could fit into comfortably right now.

AND THERE WAS MUCH REJOICING!!! 

They're my "fat jeans" from when I had a little chubby spell in grad school a few years ago. THANK GOD FOR THAT, right? Who knew that one day I would feel so good fitting into clothes I initially felt a little guilty about needing? It's all about perspective. 100% perspective.

Anyway. Mommas, be gentle with yourselves. You are exactly what you need to be for yourself, your babies, your family. Let your body heal. Let your mind rest. Do what you need to and let things just work themselves out. 

I think it's possible that I might be at my pre-baby weight when O turns 1 in January, but maybe not. I'm not bothered. 

I feel great either way!